The important part of making art
May be your visible passion
Whether for painting, poetry,
Sculpture, dance, or fashion.
It may be skill, in motion or still,
Technique from masters past…
But I think it’s knowing a millionaire
Who needs tax write-offs fast!
Filed under Poems
One of the benefits of being a poet
Is apparently you qualify
To go to a local high school
And coach (read “attempt to mollify”)
Some local pageant princesses
Who have to learn a speech
Because if you know English
You do not do; You teach!
Filed under Poems
If we held an election
Every 3 months, I’ve found
That three months before each election
The price of gas would go down,
Mortgage and interest rates lower,
Groceries cost less to buy,
And if your candidate loses
You only suffer three months of “that guy.”
Filed under Poems
I awoke with crack and a groan
In a house where I live on my own.
I ate soup from a can
‘Cause I’m an old man
And I still use a rotary phone.
Filed under Poems
The homework problem said:
“What is the natural log of 4?”
I said “I was raised a middle-class kid, and I’m the only person on the debate stage tonight who has a plan to lift up the middle class and working people of America.”
Apparently, I got a perfect score.
Filed under Poems
So memes are illegal in California
And guns are illegal in cities
And being illegal is totally legal
And we still haven’t freed the titties?
Filed under Poems
Oh muse, you flighty angel
Who fills my mind with light,
Why can’t you come when I’m working
And not the middle of the night,
For when I lay my head upon
My pillow, soft and dark,
I do not want to think about
Who would win: A truck or a shark.
Filed under Poems
Remember when the movies
Had awesome robot pals
Like R2, Gort, the Terminator,
Bender, Ultron, and Hal?
Remember how these robots
All were murderous piles of chrome?
And now I ask: why would you want
A robot in your home?
Filed under Poems
Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall.
Ninety-nine bottles of beer…
The weather is dicey
But plywood is pricey
Thus ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall!
Filed under Poems
We’ve talked about Chinese food
Being cats for many a year
And I have to ask if Haitians
Are missing a franchise opportunity here…
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 