We as a species
Devote so much time
To inventing a car
That’s smarter than us;
A car that can fly,
Can swim or can jump,
Can brake automatically
And not cause a fuss.
I think we can dream
Even bigger than this,
That the auto market,
There is a way to win it,
And we must redouble
Our effort to invent
A car that implodes
When a moron gets in it.
Filed under Poems
This world of ours has beauty
Hidden where you’d least expect.
There’s a chance for redemption
In every life that ends up wrecked.
In every gray face on the corner,
In every drop the clouds can cry,
There’s a way for you to heal
If you only choose to try.
So when the sun stops shining
Take comfort in the shade.
The beauty in the pink of dawn
Is equal to when day fades.
Eagles think they’re falling
When they first learn how to fly.
Love is all around us,
Not just in some beholders eye.
The world has many faces.
Close your eyes, the faces stay.
Whatever you think of the world
It doesn’t change its way.
Regardless of what you may believe
The truth is always true.
If you don’t believe in Heaven,
Heaven still believes in you.
Filed under Poems
So I hear there’s a hurricane
Headed for Florida.
Under most circumstances
That’s a thing I’d abhor-ida
But it’s postponed the game
‘Tween the Dolphins and Rays
So my fantasy matchup is easier
Which deserves a few “yays.”
Filed under Poems
Everything in my life sucks
So I spend a lot of time
With my vacuum cleaner
Because I love irony
And clean floors.
Filed under Poems
Glass half-empty,
Glass half-full:
Whole debate
Is kind of dull.
Glass is folded
In a ball.
I don’t get
This debate at all.
Filed under Poems
“Best by November 2016”
Was on my salad dressing.
I shook my head as I poured it on
And hoped that Kraft was guessing.
Now my life goes with the flow
And I eat only undressed veggies.
On the bright side never anymore
Do people give me wedgies.
Filed under Poems
It’s the summer time
And it isn’t snowing.
The house needs cleaning,
The grass meeds mowing.
There’s no place to park
And the clouds have gone gray
But my heart’s light and sunny
‘Cause I neuter and spay.
Filed under Poems
People complain frequently
Because something’s always bad.
If nothing’s bad at present
They remember something sad.
Alas, complainers never lack
Sources of inspiration:
If shit didn’t happen every day
They’d complain of constipation.
Filed under Poems
Sometimes in our sweet world
Hell freezes over
And you find no joy in puppies
And no luck in a four-leaf clover.
But other times our sweet world
Goes to the regular fiery Hell
And we shed our layers and get a tan
And enjoy it pretty well.
So if you’re doomed to misery
Throughout all your days
You may as well enjoy it
And smile anyways.
And if not you can leave a sarcastic comment for a preachy poet. 🙂
Filed under Poems
Optimists say the glass is half full;
Pessimists say it’s half empty.
As I poet, I must be an optimist
Because nothing rhymes with “empty.”
The Daily Travesty 