Racism is crazy!
Like if you punch a white guy
You get arrested for assault
And your mama will cry
But if you punch a black guy
In the belly or head
You’re impersonating
A police officer instead.
Tag Archives: Racism
There’s One Thing That Matters, And It’s Not Skin
I talk about love
And I talk about life,
How I do honest work
For my kids and my wife,
How I got a step up
From my forefather’s grace,
But what keeps me alive
Is the sweat on my face.
I won’t take a dime
If it hasn’t been earned;
Can’t regret when I failed
Because that’s when I learned.
I can say what I say
With no need for defense
Because what I say
Is just plain common sense.
So if you think I hate
Someone ‘cause they’re not white,
Consider a moment
That you may not be right.
Perhaps I respect
Those who earned their own keep
With an excess of ethics
And an absence of sleep;
Maybe the reason
You’re not on my mind
Is because I’m a doer
And I like my own kind.
You want to be equal?
Well, I want that too.
While I’m out here working
I’ll watch what you do
And when you go home
Having done what you should
You won’t think about race:
You’ll be feeling too good!
Filed under Poems
In 2022, Restaurants Will Be Segregated By “Coke Drinkers” and “Pepsi Drinkers” Because #SocialJustice
I use to think that crack cocaine
Was a terrible social ill,
Until the other type of Coke
Reclaimed the top of the hill
By training its employees
That they should be “less white.”
If folks buy crack then c’est la vie
But to buy coca-cola ain’t right.
Filed under Poems
You’re A Grand Wizard Harry
If all white people are racists
And support the KKK
It makes me see Hagrid
In an entirely new way.
Filed under Poems
When You Hate The Haters, You Hate Yourself, But I’m White So I Should Hate Myself Anyway And I’m So Confused…
“Everyone loves our movies”
Said the Disney corporation
As they embarked on making
Their next live-action adaptation.
“The only problem I can see”
Said a modern movie buff
“Is that your previous films
“Don’t hate straight white men enough.”
And so the Disney corporation
Began to turn away
Anyone who wasn’t brown
Or female or gay.
Now the Disney corporation
Isn’t evil, FYI
Despite their CEO Bob Iger
Being an old cis-hetero white guy.
We know he isn’t evil
And his movies aren’t trash
‘Cause anti-white discrimination
Is what brings Disney their cash
And money, after all,
Is what makes the world go round.
(Also, you know who to blame
If I go missing and am never found).
Filed under Poems
I Have A Dream That I Can Hate A**holes Of Any Color Without Being Vilified
You’re unhygienic,
Ill-tempered and mean.
You’re perhaps the worst tipper
That I’ve ever seen.
Your humor is childish.
Your language is coarse.
You’ve the breath of a dog
And the face of a horse.
You burned down my house,
Ran away with my wife,
Destroyed everything happy
I had in my life.
You’ve made far more enemies
Than you’ve made amends
But I’m white and you’re black
So I’ll say that we’re friends.
Filed under Poems
I Guess This Makes Me A Bigot, Right?
Go back a century or so
And you’ve got places blacks can’t go.
You’d be shamed to dare to love
A person from a class above.
Today my alma maters wants
To build us “No white student” haunts
And though we seek to seem the same
What’s “Commonplace” is seen as lame.
Back then we fought for equal rights
For blacks and browns and reds and whites.
Now in our “That’s racist” nation
We praise illegal immigration.
Does no one else yet see the flaw
In praising those who break the law,
The symptoms of a dying nation
Shouting for resegregation?
Yes, I want love, so please desist
With calling me “Supremacist”
And maybe past our skin we’ll find
We share a human heart and mind.
Filed under Poems
The Terrible Luck Of Being Born Into Non-Dysfunctional Cultural Paradigms
Yesterday, on Facebook,
I saw an event
That a friend wanted to,
In the future, say they went.
It was a play by Young Jean Lee
Called “Straight White Men,”
And, somewhere in my soul
I thought “Lord, not again!”
So I read the description
Of this play, ’cause ’twas late.
It said “a comedy about the people
“Who we all love to hate.”
Now that was enlightening,
And since then I’ve learned
Racism’s when white men feel good
About all that they’ve earned.
So as a straight white man
Who lives in a place
Where the windows aren’t broken
And walls aren’t defaced,
Where all violent crimes
Are, in general, rare,
I learned that such luxuries
Just aren’t fair.
I learned that I’m “privileged,”
‘Cause my life doesn’t suck,
That I’m not a poor druggy
Quite simply by luck,
That my checking account
Still has money to spare
Not because of good choices
But because life’s not fair.
Straight white men are evil
For being ourselves.
We should donate our homes
To black people or elves.
Up ’til now I’ve lived honestly,
Tried to do what was right.
I see now that’s impossible
Because I am white!
Filed under Poems
Prejudice
Sometimes you call a woman “moody”
Or you call a black guy “thug”
Or you have “check your privilege”
Printed on your favorite mug.
You might call arabs “terrorist”
Or you might call asians “smart”
Or you might subtly look away
From indians painted in Western art.
You may distrust latinos
For as far as you can throw ’em.
You may discount pacific islanders
For not fitting cleanly in a poem.
Have I forgotten anyone?
Of course! Why, silly me…
You may dislike the lgbtq
Rstuvwxyz.
If you’re opposed to any group
And think they’re weird and lame
Go ahead and voice your feelings
So the snipers know where to aim.
And if I call you stupid
Or dismissively tell you “shoo!”
It’s not because I’m prejudiced…
It’s just that I don’t like you.
Not Your Average Blackbirds
Three grey crows
Walk into a bar
Where liberals make jokes
About how white they are.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 