There once was a director of the choir
Who, after 50 years, decided to retire.
His boss gave a speech
Of such momentous reach
That I had no choice but to open fire.
Tag Archives: Short
When They Won’t Sing The Last Song Until Dean What’s-His-Face Reiterates For The Fourth Time What An Honor And privilege It Is To Congratulate His Colleague On A Career That Has Been Rewarding In So Many Innumerable Ways, Among Which Are…
Filed under Poems
Elon? Any Ideas?
They say there’s a place for everything
And everything should go in its place.;
My only question is how to efficiently
Send all the lawyers to the vacuum of space.
Filed under Poems
Formative Experiences
When the film’s PG-13
But there are boobies on the screen
You rule the world as but a teen…
‘Cause the script demanded it, know what I mean?
Filed under Poems
Online Dating (An Impressionist Retrospection)
Egg salad sandwich
Bathing in the midday sun
Wanting to be loved
Filed under Poems
12 Words Are Worth A Thousand Pictures
All alone
On porcelain throne.
Spider comes down.
Now floor is brown.
Filed under Poems
Flawless Logic
Victory is sweet.
Sweet things aren’t good for your health.
“Loser” means “healthy”.
Filed under Poems
Let It Be
A woman asking for advice
Is like a cat exposing its belly:
You can do what you think is nice
But it’s going to end up really yelly.
Filed under Poems
The Introvert Finds An Exception To The Rule
Guys, I learned something!
When you have plans for fun things
Cancelling feels bad.
Filed under Poems
Making The Most Of Modern Trends
Meet a girl who buys you chocolate,
Gets you flowers, buys dessert.
Just be aware that girls like that
May have once been your friend, Bert.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 