What if ghosts just fly around
To dig up the gossip on you
And that’s why they’re hiding under the sheets
And always whispering “OoOoOohhhh”?
Tag Archives: Travesty
Tourism
I saw a commercial on TV
For the state of Illinois.
Apparently, they have a restaurant
And a museum too. Oh boy!
I’m packing my bags and dreaming
Of my grand midwest escape
Where the humidity is thick
And so is the red tape!
Filed under Poems
True Story (Unfortunately)
Tonight, when playing pickleball
I did a little dance
While trying to smack that fickle ball
And oops! I ripped my pants!
I learned to play more cautiously.
Also, for what it’s worth
I’ve secured my reputation
As the whitest man on Earth.
Filed under Poems
Public Transit Life Hack
If you say “Sentimental Salamander” ten times
Then bellow, “Meet your doom”
People on the train will give you space
So yay to more leg room!
Filed under Poems
7-9-7
If you make a long haiku
With too many syllables in it
Nothing changes. Lighten up.
Filed under Poems
Baptist Easter
Two-Thousand Twenty-Five years ago
Judas told Jesus “YOLO”
But Jesus, lacking any fear
Said “Judas, my brudda, holdeth my beer.”
Filed under Poems
Nightmare? Or Dream Job?
Curtains rise. Spotlight.
I am in my underwear.
Modeling is weird.
Filed under Poems
He’s Exploring Alternate Channels…
There once was a man in DC
Who wrote bill A11-03.
Before it was codified
Its contents were modified
And now it’s illegal to pee.
Filed under Poems
Is This How Marketing Works?
Are you ugly?
Do you have a small penis?
Can you delineate the difference
Between a species and a genus?
If you answered no
To any of these questions
Then you’ll enjoy my poetry!
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 