There once was cowie from Maui
Who visited Kauai. How he
Got there we don’t know
But he was impressed, so
He exclaimed to all “Wowie zowie!”
Tag Archives: Silly
Next Time I’ll Choose A Muse Who Understands Hypothetical Questions!
Shall I compare thee to a Summer’s day?
Wait, really?
Ok then, I guess…
Filed under Poems
English
If “baby” is an infant
And “baby” means a loved one
And “baby” is taking care of people
And “baby” is an easily-offended someone
Then the act of taking care of
A weak beloved child
Is to baby your baby baby baby
And baby, I think that’s wild!
Filed under Poems
Ladies, Learn To Reboot A Router
If your husband is pooping
And taking his time
So that hours have passed
And the scent is a crime
There’s no need to bother
With a knock or a shout;
His business will finish
When the Wifi goes out.
Filed under Poems
The Rhythm Of Universal Truth
No matter the size of our brains
Or the density of our bums
All humans are united in knowing
That buttocks can double as bongo drums.
Filed under Poems
The Benefits Of Not Being Tan
In a world without coyotes
And a scarcity of ginger ale
I’d take comfort in the notion
That my legs would still be pale.
Filed under Poems
French Geography, German Efficiency
There once was a limerick from Nice
That was astonishingly concise.
Filed under Poems
The Day God Made Africa?
And on the twenty-second day
God said “Let 99 men moisten the grass
“And the hundredth man you shall eschew”.
Even then it was widely known
That one hundred men or more
Could never dew.
Filed under Poems
I’m Too Old For Lumps Or Finger Painting, But Maybe She’ll Hang This On Her Fridge Instead?
Today is my mother’s birthday.
Her birth did occur on this date.
In honor of her I caused this poem to occur
And published it moderately late.
Filed under Poems
Dr. Strangelove 2, Or How The Bomb Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love Herself
I wanted to ask a guy to the prom
But alas I’m a thermonuclear bomb.
Were I to go out in a pretty pink dress
I’d make the whole world feel considerable stress
And instead of the dancing and sighing and kissing
Everyone would shout “Hey, there’s a warhead that’s missing”
And before I’d say “Chill guys, you’re all being dumb”
They’d put me back with the uranium.
And so in my bunker I cry and I dream
Of a man who will see me for more than I seem,
Who’ll sweep me away for one memorable night
Even though afterwards the world won’t be alright…
But maybe a man cannot make me complete
And instead I’ll be happy as radiant heat?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 