Sometimes I wonder if I’d be happier
If I’d been born as an eel,
But then when a movie takes a shocking turn
I wouldn’t know how to feel…
Then I go on Google to find an animal
That’s happiest, and today I found it:
Introducing the greatest bird ever…
The American Bushtit.
Filed under Poems
Every time you set up a game
Of chess and take a pawn
You’ve created a token minority.
That’s all for tonight… moving on…
Filed under Poems
Toses ate ted
Violets ate blue.
Appatently changing a lettet
Makes things hungty, ctew!
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!sdren …kcab ti daer ot troffe taerg ot oG
ot dediced ohW
uoy a osla saw erehT
.sdrow kcal did eh dnim sih ni esuaceB
sdrawkcab etorw ohw yug a saw ecno erehT
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There once was a woman whose hair
Was, due to alopecia, not there.
One guy smacked a comic
And I find it ironic
That anyone still seems to care.
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There once was a chicken from Spain
Who was in a whole lot of pain.
I said to him, “Yo yo!
“‘Sup, suffering pollo?”
He said “Puckaw” with disdain.
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Somedays I think that people stink;
They’re lazy and they’re rude.
Then I remind myself their kind
Makes all the tasty food,
And so I sniff and get a whiff
Of B.O. and lemonade…
When life gives you lemons, you need to demons
trate that it’s not a bad trade.
Filed under Poems
We’re all human, the same flesh and blood,
And our brains all work the dame way,
But some people think that a child named Dink
Is perfectly fine and okay
While others are Henry for 12 generations
And some are named Diogenese
And yet never in history has someone had
A child named “Delicious Melty Cheese.”
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Not enough poems are written
About the legendary Scott:
We would remedy this, except
Of what he did, we knowest not.
Filed under Poems
This Saturday the mask mandate
Expires in my state,
So people must be healthy
Like the records indicate…
And yet today was Wednesday
And I will surely die, since
I took my mask off early
And I happen to trust science.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 