I am both a poet and nerd
And I learned a most interesting word:
It’s definition: “To beat
“An object with a stick.” Neat?
The word, as I learned it, is “Yerd”.
Tag Archives: Vocabulary
Your Vocabulary Word Of The Day Is…
Sometimes it can be tough
To deal with all of your stuff,
And so the path that seems easiest
Is to be an eccedentesiast.
Filed under Poems
Higher Education is a Cure for Introversion
I once found it tough
To talk about stuff,
But then I went to college.
Now I regale ya
About paraphernalia
‘Cause now I’ve got the knowledge!
Filed under Poems
Why You Shouldn’t Be An English Major
Bucolic was the morning mist
On fields outside of Boise.
The adults sipped their hot caffein
And the children weren’t noisy.
Within one comely bungalow
A dalliance effloresced.
You probably don’t know what that means
And perhaps it’s for the best.
I bring up this erstwhile dalliance
Between man and ingénou
With intentional insouciance
To show I’m smarter than you.
The denouement of this poem,
Evanescent as it is,
Shows evidence of the inurement
I’ve derived from colleges.
Filed under Poems
There’s A Guy Who Gets His Ass Kicked In A Dark Alley
Sometimes I lie away at night
Wondering which fancy jackass
Invented the word “pretentious.”
If our positions should coincide
In an unlit walkway between buildings
I’d like to thrust a limb pertaining to my lower body
To the rear-side of the juncture connecting his counterparts of the aforementioned lower-body elements
Purely for hedonic gratification.
Filed under Poems
Oops! I meant “Perfunctory.” Wait, No…
“Pusillanimous”
Was how I described my date.
I did not get laid.
Filed under Poems
People Who Don’t Know What “Masticating” Means Are Going To Think This Poem Is Weirder Than It Actually Is
My hands are very cold
As I stand outside at night
Typing in this crummy poem
Because I just have too, all right?
Earlier I was occupied
With eating what I was masticating
But as I suffer in the moment
I regret procrastinating.
Filed under Poems
To All The PhDs Enjoying a Sporting Event Today (Or On A Given Future Day, Circumstances Permitting)
I realize this day is special
For a contest will take place
In which genetically superior constituents
Will seek, in scoring, to outpace
Their counterparts in opposition
Within a time allotted,
Thus justifying the fiduciary endowments
With which said constituents are besotted.
I hope that in future contests
Of similar athletic variety
That your subgroup of physically-fit object-movers
May prove worthy of your them-focused piety.
In fact, I would extend my well wishes
That your team may excel in perpetuity
Until their superior members inevitably decay
And we may correct our lost-time incongruity.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 