I think Albino representation
Is what modern Hollywood lacks.
After all, if there are no albinos
What roles will Netflix give the blacks?
Tag Archives: Travesty
H*ck Yeah!
If you’re afraid someone might think
That you’re sort of a d*ck
Then emulate the mainstream news
And use this little tr*ck
Wherein you take a common word
Like ch*cken, sn*ke, or d*sc
And replace one relevant l*tter
With a h*ndy asterisk!
N*body can blame you
Or say you’re being r*de
‘Cause words like f*ck and bullsh*t
Are not, in themselves cr*de.
Don’t w*rry about the fact
That you can read all this just f*ne:
What m*tters is that readers
Know you h*ven’t got a sp*ne.
Filed under Poems
Plus The One About Chocolate Slaves Murdering Lottery Winners For Their Zany CEO’s Amusement…
Children’s books today address
Bullying and gender
And how to make vegan, non-fat,
Pastrami in a blender.
Children’s books in my day
Were like “Bears go to the beach,”
And “Here’s a story ’bout some kid
“With an enormous peach.”
As The Animals Become More Dangerous…
If wishes were horses
The poor would ride.
If wishes were tigers
The poor would hide.
If wishes were wives
The poor would go fishing.
If wishes were were lawyers
I wish we’d quit wishing.
Filed under Poems
All Keys Are Equal, But Some Are More Equal Than Others
I asked my mom, the keyboard,
Who her favorite child was.
She said, “I have no favorite
“And the reason is because
“I love all my kids the same.
“They’re all precious to me.”
And everyone believed her
Except the right “SHIFT” key.
Filed under Poems
In 2022, Restaurants Will Be Segregated By “Coke Drinkers” and “Pepsi Drinkers” Because #SocialJustice
I use to think that crack cocaine
Was a terrible social ill,
Until the other type of Coke
Reclaimed the top of the hill
By training its employees
That they should be “less white.”
If folks buy crack then c’est la vie
But to buy coca-cola ain’t right.
Filed under Poems
When You Can’t Bear A Bare Bear With A Bare Bear Baby
There once was a bear with her cub
At the front of the line at the club.
Neither wore clothing,
And the club started closing
So I pulled out my .38 snub…
Filed under Poems
Which of the Following Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?
Yet another sign
That our publics schools suck ass:
They have a grading rubric
For a “creative writing” class.
Filed under Poems
That’s Almost As Many “Likes” As Teenagers Can Say In One Minute Without Even Trying
I’m 8 “Likes” away from 21,000
In the history of my blog.
My heart is very excited
And my soul is like a dog.
If 8 more people like my crap
I’ll finally achieve my goal
Of getting as many likes as a girl
Who posts dancing pics with a pole.
Filed under Poems, To the Reader
What Are Your Other Two Wishes?
“Prove that genies aren’t real!”
Demanded my stepbrother, Buzz.
“The greatest proof genies don’t exist
“Is that single-ply toilet paper still does.”
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 