I like the idea that there was a caveman
Who coincidentally looked like Jesus
And when Jesus’s body was hidden away
The caveman came out just to please us
And seeing society for the first time
He didn’t know what else to do
So he used his caveman magic
And up into heaven he flew.
Meanwhile, actual Jesus
Woke up after three days or so
But everyone said he’d already ascended
And, to heaven, he’d no need to go
So he went back to being a carpenter
And made many beautiful shims
And sent every customer home with a smile
And said many, “Nope, I just look like him”s.
The Daily Travesty 