Every night I go to sleep
After a simple prayer
When I recall the Star Wars sequels
And wish they weren’t there.
Every day when I awake
My wish was not obeyed,
But someday soon we’ll see a world
In which only six were made…
Category Archives: Poems
Jasmine Is Not A Fan Of Arabian Heat
Mohammed had a magic carpet
That very ably flew;
It could go zero to sixty
In precisely 8.2
But Aladdin had a carpet
With a sunroof and AC
So the choice of who to date
Was obvious to me!
Filed under Poems
The Ballad Of Marshmellow, Pt. 116
There once was a belly-up cat
Whose entire body was made of fat.
He lay on his back,
Then with claws did attack
And then fell asleep just like that!
Filed under Poems
One Joke Too Far
I walked up to my teacher
When I was eight years old
And smiled widely and said this,
Or so I have been told:
“Why’d the agoraphobic sled dog
“Not eat the deluxe pizza on the floor?
“He was afraid of too much mush room.”
That’s why I don’t go to school anymore.
Filed under Poems
The Weaker Poetry Bloggers, One Year Into The Apocalypse… #Weak
‘Twas on a night near end of Spring
When I was asked to write a thing
Describing how the flowers bloomed
Even though humanity’s doomed.
“Roses are red“, so started my verse
“And violets are blue, unlike that hearse.”
And then I decided since I’d end up dead
To quit writing poems and play golf instead.
So wrote a lesser poet just days
Before he was eaten by the undead horde.
When apocalypse comes, I’ll struggle in ways
But never complain that, when writing, I’m bored.
Filed under Poems
Research Projects
Forsythia is a flower
Of the family oleaceae.
They’re pretty and they’re yellow
And they make me saeae
“Ooh, look at that forsythia!
“They’re of the order lamiales!”
Then I ask my mother
If she’ll cook me tamales.
Filed under Poems
Different Decade, Same Crap
It’s been exactly ten years today
Since I wrote my first post here:
May 28th, the fateful day,
2012 the fateful year.
Back then people were afraid
The Mayan calendar was done
And the world would finish with it
And nobody had fun.
If they looked ahead ten years
To life in 2022
They’d try to ask the Mayans
Why they didn’t follow through.
Filed under Poems
Things That Lasted Waaay Too Long
First there was Vietnam
Then the second gulf war…
Now I’m curious how many years
The Amber Heard trial goes for.
Filed under Poems
Piece by Peace
You told me that you’re broken
But I have to disagree.
You’re at the disadvantage
Of not seeing what I see.
You don’t see my future
When mascara washes away;
You don’t see the smile
I ask God for when I pray;
You don’t hear the stars align
Every time you laugh and sing.
Even when you feel broken
You’re my everything.
So when you say you’re broken
Disbelieve a little while
While I become a mirror
To show you how you smile,
How you laugh and how you sing
And cry but keep on living;
I want to reflect to you
The love you’re always giving
Until the sun will rise again
And together we will shine
And find your broken pieces
Fit perfectly with mine.
Filed under Poems
Notice I Didn’t Mention Her Age 😋
Happy Birthday Mother!
You gave birth like no other
Yo me and my sis,
So you I will kiss
And otherwise shamelessly smother!
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 