I played a game of Monopoly
And the reactions spanned quite a panoply.
I bankrupted my friends
‘Cause means justify ends…
Now I’ve a monocle and I act foppily.
Tag Archives: Limerick
First Date Conversations
There once was some rear pelvic part
That emitted the deadliest fart.
The gas from the bowels
Caused the most gruesome howls,
Worse even than most modern art.
Filed under Poems
Weather Or Not
There once was a guy from Poempeii
Who awoke on a cold, rainy day.
He said “Gods, I hate rain!
“Could you please stop this pain?”
How the Gods answered blew him away.
Filed under Poems
The Ballad Of Marshmellow, Pt. 116
There once was a belly-up cat
Whose entire body was made of fat.
He lay on his back,
Then with claws did attack
And then fell asleep just like that!
Filed under Poems
Notice I Didn’t Mention Her Age 😋
Happy Birthday Mother!
You gave birth like no other
Yo me and my sis,
So you I will kiss
And otherwise shamelessly smother!
Filed under Poems
Happy Delusions
If I had a pet stegosaurus
I think I would name it Boris
And until someone finked
That he was extinct
My family would really adore us.
Coming Soon To A Kindergarten Near You
There once was a five-year-old child
Who was happy, and ran somewhat wild.
This continued unabated
Because the child wasn’t medicated
And thus several lawsuits were filed.
Filed under Poems
In Other News, How Did 10:53 Become “Late”?
There once was a poet in bed
With ideas flush in his head,
But he stayed ip too late
And, as was his fate,
He dashed down a limerick instead.
Filed under Poems
Ooh… And Throw In A Twist Villain And Random One-Liners Whenever The MANY Main Characters Die But Then Come Back To Life Because Time Travel
There once was a film from the past
And people said it was a blast;
Then Hollywood said
“What if instead
“It had an (insert group here) cast?”
Filed under Poems
The First Zebra Is Born
There was a majestic white horse
Who was, of nature, a force.
She said “It’s alright
“That our kid’s black and white”
But her husband still wants a divorce.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 