Tag Archives: Short

I’m Officially Trademarking The Pathetic Two-Liner

Tonight we played games ‘til 11:00 PM

Which is a good reason for short poems ™

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Haiku, Because Obviously

At my girlfriend’s house…

Use your imagination

Or don’t… that’s your call

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It’s Not Funny At All Until You Read It Out Loud, Out Of Context, To Your Friends

Toses ate ted

Violets ate blue.

Appatently changing a lettet

Makes things hungty, ctew!

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Modern Presidents

There once was a democracy

Of half a billion, plus me.

The others said no,

But I said yes, so

You are my slaves. Hee hee hee.

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yrroS toN …yrroS

!sdren …kcab ti daer ot troffe taerg ot oG

ot dediced ohW

uoy a osla saw erehT

.sdrow kcal did eh dnim sih ni esuaceB

sdrawkcab etorw ohw yug a saw ecno erehT

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Assault? Blacklist Him! Sex Slavery? Let’s Let Him Slide Quietly Out Of The Public Eye (Yay Hollywood)

There once was an actor named Will

Who was punished for slapping, until

He thought “I’ll never be arrested

“If they knew I molested

“And trafficked minors for capitol hill!”

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Suck It, Hanging Gardens Of Babylon!

It rises like a mountain,

Slopes gently like a hill,

Softer than a lullaby

And gives me such a thrill;

A spectacle, a marvel,

And my mouth will never shut

As I gaze with loving splendor

On my girl’s majestic butt.

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Bucket Lists

Somebody jumped out of a plane one day

With a bedsheet, said “Wahoo!”

And a generation of millennials will decide if they lived

By whether or not they did that too.

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It’s like 2012 Never Ended

Today I stood at the gas pump

And couldn’t help but feel

That one Bitcoin for a gallon of gas

Will once again be a good deal.

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The Whole World Is Just The WWE Now, But Without The Clever Storylines

There once was a woman whose hair

Was, due to alopecia, not there.

One guy smacked a comic

And I find it ironic

That anyone still seems to care.

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