A twenty-year-old white girl asked
Why mice seek out a trap.
Then she smiled and sang along
To ALL the gangster rap!
Tag Archives: Short
1-17 Are Just Slime… 19-100 Are Escargot
When my car won’t work
Because something is faulty
I tend to get angry
Or, some would say, salty.
Yes, salt and rage fill me
Whenever I fail…
That’s reason 18
I’m glad I’m not a snail.
Filed under Poems
Some People Get Paid Millions For This…
If you have a friend who is male
Here’s a game that will never get stale:
Find a sports team or three,
Guess who’ll win, disagree…
You’ll be right half the time without fail!
Filed under Poems
Tomato, Tomahtow
My sister called me self-disciplined.
I said, “I don’t know what you mean.”
She said, “You publish a poem EVERY DAY.”
I said, “That’s just low standards and a routine!”
Filed under Poems
In America!
“An apple a day
“Keeps the doctor away,”
Or so my mama said.
“You’ve got no cash
“So you’ll soon turn to ash,”
Is what doctors say instead.
Filed under Poems
Be Me At 11:49
There once was a poet from here
Who enjoyed quite a bit of good cheer.
He ran out of time
To make comedy rhyme
But I’ll be better soon, never fear!
Filed under Poems
Dating In The Country Be Like…
I hear her dad has fewer teeth
Than guns hung on his walls…
I heard her seven brothers
Got among ’em 19 balls…
I’ve heard her mom got famous
As a former L.A. Ram…
But I heard she ain’t got no beard
So I don’t give a damn!
Filed under Poems
Strange Phobias
There once was a young christmas tree
Who saw mom and dad chopped by me.
It stands still for now,
But someday, somehow
It will run fresh out of mercy…
Filed under Poems
More Inspiring Covid Stories
I used to dress in a suit and tie
And drive off to my job
Creating animated models
For my supervisor, Rob.
One day, Rob pulled me aside
And said, “Work from home, dude.”
I’m still an animator
But now I model nude.
Filed under Poems
Your Nostalgia Is Complete
I read someone’s list
Of their favorite childhood movies…
The Lion King, Bambi… those types.
If you are its creator
I want to remind you
Of the Microsoft screensaver pipes.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 