At what age can you no longer say
“Do you want to be friends?” to a stranger?
It seems to be somewhere between six and 90
And otherwise they call you “Danger”.
But I think the world would be happier
If we’d ask to be friends way more often.
Sure, they can say “no”, but give it some time
And society will soon start to soften.
Filed under Poems
I used to be excited
When new video games released
So I could see new features
And how the quality increased.
Now I watch the new releases
And I’m on the lookout for
The rereleases of the games
Made in 2004.
Filed under Poems
I had an hour this evening
So I watched Youtube for ten minutes.
Now it’s Saturday morning.
Funny how life goes, innit?
Filed under Poems
Fourth and seven Bills:
Kincaid almost got the catch…
Well #*$&… Go Eagles!
Filed under Poems
I am the guy who doesn’t drink
But you would never know.
I order fancy cocktails like
A coke and H2O,
A margarita with just the rocks,
A daiquiri sans gin,
A Moscow Mule without the lime
And hold the liquid sin.
These lines and others have done me right
And now I’m proud to be
Watching some Youtube on Friday night
Just I, Myself, and Me!
Filed under Poems
Red light? Stop!
Green light? Go!
Yellow light? Apparently
That one means “drive real slow”.
Filed under Poems
Lonely toilet, late at night.
I don’t need no stinkin’ light.
Wait? Why don’t I hear a splash?
Oops! Guess that bowl was the trash.
Filed under Poems
If a company offered a product
That did not require ongoing billing
And was free from both ads and AI
That company would make a killing
And yet we get apps for our parking,
Our banking, our clothes, our TVs
And sure, they sell our lives to China
But at least the law makes them say “please”.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 