A pyromaniacal lizard,
A grand aquatic turtle,
A plant-infested dinosaur
Walk into a bar.
Some ten-yeard-olds
Go on a quest with them.
It’s worked out well so far.
Tag Archives: Pokemon
Stanzas 2, Thought 0
When I moved into
The mobile home park
I thought my life
Was turning dark,
But I found pleasure
As I sought paying labors
In the form of melo-
Dramatic neighbors.
If you say “hello”
They say “Hail traveler!”
You say “I like Charizard,”
And they say “I love Graveler!”
It’s like they’re in a movie,
So although my life’s a failure
I take solace in the fact
They’re a theatrical trailer.
Filed under Poems
Unbiased Advice On Picking Your Pokemon Go Team
Now that we can realize
Our Pokemon-catching dreams
We must make the hard decision
Of picking from three teams.
The team that you decide on
Is the team to which you stick,
So I’ve written this unbiased poem
To help you make your pick.
First we have team valor,
The team for the brave and true.
Second is team instinct
If impulsive describes you.
If either of these teams
Is the one you eventually choose
I hope that you find comfort
In the fact you’re sure to lose.
For among the three teams
One’s sure to reign supreme:
The mighty Articuno
Leads the mighty Mystic team!
If you reside anywhere
From the South Pole to Juneau
Know that you’ll find victory
With Team Blue and Articuno.
If you pick red and Moltres
Or Zapdos and team yellow
You’re surely a disgrace
And an addle-brain-ed fellow
For mystic gives you answers
That don’t require you to think.
Besides, unlike the other two
Team Mystic doesn’t stink.
I’ve presented much hard evidence
To support my choice,
But if you still think otherwise
I urge you – raise your voice!
I’d love to read your poems
That explain how you chose wrong.
Now just imagine this poem ends
With fireworks and a gong.
Filed under Poems
My Life At This Moment
I’ve been awake
For fourty hours now.
Almost got murdered
By a stray dog tonight.
I’m whiter than mayo
Or milk from a cow
But they released #PokemonGo
So I guess I’m alright.
Filed under Poems
Fandoms
Frodo was a wizard
In a blue police box.
He keeps watch over Gotham
And wears “Game of Thrones” socks.
His nemesis was Gary Oak.
He aimed to misbehave.
If you understand this poem
Give a fellow fan a wave.
Gotta Catch The One
When I was a kid
My hardest choice
Was choosing between Charizard
And Blastoise.
I’ve grown up since then,
Lived through rises and falls,
And I now capture hearts
Instead of monsters in balls.
And I’ve met many women,
But no no love proved true.
But I caught all 150
When I laid eyes on you.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 