There once was a film from the past
And people said it was a blast;
Then Hollywood said
“What if instead
“It had an (insert group here) cast?”
Tag Archives: Truth
Ooh… And Throw In A Twist Villain And Random One-Liners Whenever The MANY Main Characters Die But Then Come Back To Life Because Time Travel
Filed under Poems
Eight Lines In Two Minutes… I’m Inspired 🥰
Tonight I was abducted
By a girl with rosy hair
And forced into abiding love
Of depth both fine and rare.
She’s brushing her teeth now
And I’m trying to write this fast.
(This wasn’t my first “my girl’s here” poem
And it surely won’t be my last).
Filed under Poems
For The One
I love how ordinary days
Can set my heart alight.
I love the normal, glorious ways
Your face can glow so bright,
How just to fall asleep with you
Makes my entire week
And how many ways we say “I love you”
With eyes and blushing cheeks.
I’m glad I make you feel safe
When life just isn’t fair.
My heart is yours and much more full
Than my poor head of hair.
Filed under Poems
Petty Thoughts
One Wednesday a mouse got into the house
Of the woman I love, heart and soul.
She has a cat who’s remarkably fat
But knows not its mouse-catching role.
Her friends have a pug. He’s remarkably ugly
In an adorable way.
He got rewarded because we reported
He pooped twice in the same day.
All of these pets and the prizes they get
Cannot help my heart softly wish
That just for a day I was treated the way
The people I love treat their fish.
Filed under Poems
I’m Officially Trademarking The Pathetic Two-Liner
Tonight we played games ‘til 11:00 PM
Which is a good reason for short poems ™
Filed under Poems
She Even Reads My Bad Poems ❤️
Once in a while you meet someone nice,
And once a year someone ideal,
But once in a lifetime you might meet a person
Who’s someone entirely real;
Who burps like a hippo and sleeps like a kitten
With hair that demands that you pet it;
They’ll go out of their way to buy baby corn
Though it took them two Safeways to get it.
Sometimes that person is one of a kind,
Someone faithful and honest and true,
And your only job is forgetting to doubt
That their perfect partner is you.
Filed under Poems
Modern Presidents
There once was a democracy
Of half a billion, plus me.
The others said no,
But I said yes, so
You are my slaves. Hee hee hee.
Filed under Poems
Suck It, Hanging Gardens Of Babylon!
It rises like a mountain,
Slopes gently like a hill,
Softer than a lullaby
And gives me such a thrill;
A spectacle, a marvel,
And my mouth will never shut
As I gaze with loving splendor
On my girl’s majestic butt.
Filed under Poems
It’s like 2012 Never Ended
Today I stood at the gas pump
And couldn’t help but feel
That one Bitcoin for a gallon of gas
Will once again be a good deal.
Filed under Poems
Forget “Hope”, “Faith”, “Joy”… Give Me a Good Name!
We’re all human, the same flesh and blood,
And our brains all work the dame way,
But some people think that a child named Dink
Is perfectly fine and okay
While others are Henry for 12 generations
And some are named Diogenese
And yet never in history has someone had
A child named “Delicious Melty Cheese.”
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 