Well, you tried to con a dollar
From my hard day’s work
But I’ve never worked a day in my life.
Then you tried to sell me something
In an unmarked bag.
I said “Maybe, but I gotta ask my wife.”
Then you pulled a Smith and Wesson
From your paint-on jeans
And you told me “Pull your wallet out slow.”
Nine months later you’ve a stroller,
I’m approved for my parole-a.
When it’s love, sometimes you just know.
Filed under Poems
On evenings free of clouds and light
One can look upon the sky,
On twinkling stars and silent night
And think of tales the stars belie.
You’ll see Orion, proud and strong,
Bears and dippers, great and small,
A Zodiac twelve members strong,
And not a truth among them all!
Of what are constellations made?
Nature’s lines drawn by the dead,
Sparkling points on Heaven sprayed
And named by man for men misled.
Wives read horoscopes ’til late
As Cygnus and Aquila gleam.
The constellations of their fate
Are closer than they first may seem.
The stars above are heroes past
To marvel at by absent sun,
But we are heroes born at last,
You and I and everyone.
Look not to the stars for love
Or what the future mayhap hide.
Dreams come not from up above
But from the stars we are inside.
Filed under Poems
I meant to write a verse that’s funny
Involving Jesus and a bunny.
Alas, the laughter all was cheap
And so I left without a peep.
Filed under Poems
There once was a poet named
Whose brilliance was greater than.
By leaving off the last
He got around the whole
And never again worried about.
Filed under Poems
Sometimes I wonder
What life would be like
If chickens went bowling
And cows went on strike,
If dolphins loved hockey
And dogs weren’t adored
And monkeys were funky
And, yes, I’m that bored.
Filed under Poems
If you’re rude to the people
Who print drivers’ licenses
They have a pretty cool trick:
They take a photo
Of your face
But actually it’s a dick pic.
Filed under Poems
I was a teenager after a year,
Middle aged by the time I was two.
I’d spend months in a minute chasing a ball
And spent weekends taking a poo.
A scratch on my ears was an hour in heaven
Though it seemed but a second to man.
I wonder if master can feel my time
And pray one of his seconds he can.
Filed under Poems
Thousands of New Yorkers
Are dying every day,
Yet no one has the courage
To step on up and say
“Send every smart-mouthed teenager
“Some radioactive Purell.”
We could have superheroes by now
But the government says “Oh well…”
Filed under Poems
In Venice, the dolphins are happy,
Galavanting in the canals;
Some folks say that Covid is the reason.
The people of Miami
Have big smiles as well
Because their Dolphins might not play this season!
Filed under Poems
Today I saw this comment
Responding to a poem of mine.
He read the poem as many times
As I’ve had valentines.
He thought it was informative,
So unless I am a loon
I suspect that “Michael Pearson”
Will be in congress soon.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 