Toses ate ted
Violets ate blue.
Appatently changing a lettet
Makes things hungty, ctew!
Tag Archives: Postaday
Modern Presidents
There once was a democracy
Of half a billion, plus me.
The others said no,
But I said yes, so
You are my slaves. Hee hee hee.
Filed under Poems
The Real Monster Is The Underpaid Babysitter Who Reads This Poem To Your Kids Before Bed
Beds are safe and soft and warm
And in them you won’t come to harm.
But when you wake to pee at night
Then be harmed you may well might.
That’s why when you have to pee
Don’t get up for the W.C.
Your mattress was absorbantly designed
And I promise mom and dad won’t mind!
Filed under Poems
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uoy a osla saw erehT
.sdrow kcal did eh dnim sih ni esuaceB
sdrawkcab etorw ohw yug a saw ecno erehT
Filed under Poems
Assault? Blacklist Him! Sex Slavery? Let’s Let Him Slide Quietly Out Of The Public Eye (Yay Hollywood)
There once was an actor named Will
Who was punished for slapping, until
He thought “I’ll never be arrested
“If they knew I molested
“And trafficked minors for capitol hill!”
Filed under Poems
Suck It, Hanging Gardens Of Babylon!
It rises like a mountain,
Slopes gently like a hill,
Softer than a lullaby
And gives me such a thrill;
A spectacle, a marvel,
And my mouth will never shut
As I gaze with loving splendor
On my girl’s majestic butt.
Filed under Poems
We’re All In The Mood For A Melody (Plus Innocent Townsfolk To Bite)
It patrols the oceans, breathing in and out
Horrible and jolly all at once.
Scientists see it and ponder about
Whether perhaps this is how the beast hunts?
Don’t underestimate musical cheer;
It’s bite is as fierce as its bark.
Yes, if you see it you’ll quiver in fear…
The majestic harmonica shark!
Filed under Poems
Bucket Lists
Somebody jumped out of a plane one day
With a bedsheet, said “Wahoo!”
And a generation of millennials will decide if they lived
By whether or not they did that too.
Filed under Poems
It’s like 2012 Never Ended
Today I stood at the gas pump
And couldn’t help but feel
That one Bitcoin for a gallon of gas
Will once again be a good deal.
Filed under Poems
The Whole World Is Just The WWE Now, But Without The Clever Storylines
There once was a woman whose hair
Was, due to alopecia, not there.
One guy smacked a comic
And I find it ironic
That anyone still seems to care.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 