Tag Archives: Life

Oligarchy Elementary Is Accepting New Students

I beg your pardon

For I mean to yap at thee

My case for nonconsensual

Reallocation of apathy,

For were we to allow

Our youth to expand

Their range of beliefs

We’d soon lose command

Of the best and the brightest

And the dullards alike.

Though the latter don’t argue

The former’d take a hike

And should free-thinkers see

All the ways we have lied…

Well, that is a notion

We must not abide.

Thus we must imprison

(At least to an extent)

Those who’ve not yet reached

The age of consent

And proceed to tell them

Facts they will ignore

To distract from the world

That they long to explore.

We’ll teach them arithmetic,

Reading, and writing

But most of all that

There is no need for fighting

For if each one resisted

Each oppressive foe

Then our script would be flipped

We, the high, become low.

Thus state education

In all things miscellaneous

Shall ensure that our underlings

Are not extemporaneous.

Thus closes my pitch

For public education.

We overlords live

Thanks to school’s misdirection.

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Don’t Piss Off A Nurse

If one’s life relies upon

The lungs of an automaton

Prudence dictates to be couth

With the medical attendant youth.

Everything can be made worse

When dealing with a jilted nurse

So to those on life support:

Life’s long unless your temper’s short.

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All The Credit To You!

It took almost six whole years

But this blog has made it’s mark.

One-thousand and five subscribers

Have felt TDT’s spark.

It proves, with dedication,

Anyone can win it:

I did in 69 months

What a bikini-clad person does in minutes!

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40 Virgins Is A Better Incentive… Just Saying

They mentioned becoming Jewish.

They said I ought and should.

Then the bris and lack of bacon came up

And Hell started to sound real good.

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That’ll Wake You Up!

Some people pour milk in their coffee.

Some people pour milk in their tea.

This morning I mixed up the orange juice and milk.

It was as you’d expect it to be.

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Yep, Still Single…

Cancer is better than feminists.

Of this I am convinced.

I know people who beat cancer

And haven’t heard from it since.

But fate is not so happy

For those who’ve contracted feminism

For between them and common sense

Is a nigh-incurable schism.

Cancer kills quickly and painfully.

Feminism’s mostly the same

Except it lacks social stigma

And casts a whole lot more blame.

Feminists ask for equality

While cancer makes all of us equal.

Cancer terminates us while feminism

Makes an all-female terminator sequel.

And if you find you’re a feminist

Whether long-term or out of the blue

You have to live with yourself. With cancer

That’s something you don’t have to do.

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Poetry > Humans

When, in poems, rhyming’s done

Most people think its lots of fun

But in day-to-day conversing

I notice the trend of fun reversing.

It’s as if, when someone speaks

And you interject a word like “creaks”

The custom of matching final phonemes

Becomes less fun than it, in poetry, seems.

So whenever people get in a huff

When my replies happen to rhyme with their stuff

I’m glad to use this blog as a replacement

For talking to people outside of my basement.

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Quick Bonus Poem

If you want to feel sadder

Than you’ve ever felt

Imagine a world

In which cheese doesn’t melt.

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Almost Never Say Never

They said man wouldn’t walk on the moon

But a few brave souls proved them wrong.

People still pay to see an opera by Wagner

That’s more than 24 hours long.

People say “finding your passion” is silly

But it sounds like a solid idea to me.

But we’ll never have a Jurassic Park movie

Featuring common sense and decent security.

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My Angsty Years

Somewhere around fifth grade

I asked myself why

I should work to make money

‘Til I get sick and die.

So I sought counter-culture,

Tried to listen to rap

But found “counter-culture”

Espoused the same crap.

Fight club was edgy

But I don’t like fighting.

MGTOW was compelling

But I’m fond of white-knighting.

So here I was, trapped

Between primness and zeal

Before I found out

That’s what most people feel.

The thug life chose me

But because I abhor it

I friend-zoned the thug life

And we’re both better for it.

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