Tag Archives: America

July 3, 2018 · 12:37 pm

The Analogy Is Actually Kinda Perfect

America is like Halo:

It started out with violence

And an independent spirit

Fighting an immortal empire

Who knew well that we’d fear it.

Then the beloved sequel came

And we gave up the slaves we stole,

Fought a battle on both sides

To forge our true united soul.

Then came history’s “Halo 3”

Which was forgettable all in all,

Clearly not its glorious peak

But it hadn’t hit the wall.

When the Vietnam years came

Thus started Halo 4

Where we spat on our own soldiers

Drafted into pointless war.

Now here we are in Halo 5

Where profit is the king,

Equality is an afterthought

And everything’s covered in bling.

We who love the franchise past,

The Halo 1’s and 2’s

Who love America in spirit

Not America in the news

Look hopefully at the future

While feeling kind of vexed

Wondering what the powers that be

Will inevitably screw up next.

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July 1, 2018 · 7:21 am

I Guess This Makes Me A Bigot, Right?

Go back a century or so

And you’ve got places blacks can’t go.

You’d be shamed to dare to love

A person from a class above.

Today my alma maters wants

To build us “No white student” haunts

And though we seek to seem the same

What’s “Commonplace” is seen as lame.

Back then we fought for equal rights

For blacks and browns and reds and whites.

Now in our “That’s racist” nation

We praise illegal immigration.

Does no one else yet see the flaw

In praising those who break the law,

The symptoms of a dying nation

Shouting for resegregation?

Yes, I want love, so please desist

With calling me “Supremacist”

And maybe past our skin we’ll find

We share a human heart and mind.

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June 30, 2018 · 1:56 pm

Peasant Problems

They told me to lift dumbbells

‘Cause my arms were far too thin.

I couldn’t check if they were right

‘Cause Congress wouldn’t let me in.

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June 17, 2018 · 11:55 am

The Flavor Of “Winning”

For a moment I sat there

With blood on my hands

Smearing life on my white-bread toast

In a room all alone

With inanimate friends

In a halfway house built for a ghost.

My Ferrari was mired

In a 90-hour week

When I needed just 12 to survive

But I’d long since stopped living

For the privilege of being

Among the elite few who can thrive.

The child in the basement

Was calling for daddy

‘Til its fat little throat had gone raw

And yet I was too busy

Helping others to join me

To notice my life had a flaw.

But if I’d payed attention,

Tasted a tomato

Or felt a moth land in my hair,

Just walked outside barefoot

Or put salt in my coffee

I’d realize somehow I still care.

I care about family.

I care about freedom.

I don’t need this bottle and pill.

And maybe that baby

Will say “taste the tomato”

And if I haven’t yet died then I will.

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June 15, 2018 · 4:21 pm

A Squirt Of Perspective

Slice of lemon in your glass?

That happens all the time,

But have you ever wondered why

It’s not a slice of lime?

The lighter-colored citrus fruits

Are served most frequently

Because climate change and racists.

That’s what half the people see.

The other half are shouting

That the lack of water-limes

Is thanks to the free-market

In these far-from-certain times

And that the pro-lime lobbyists

Will take your guns away

And so in lemon drinks we trust…

In Jesus’ name we pray.

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June 13, 2018 · 2:45 pm

Cooked Allah Mode

There is a mighty crater here

Where recently there wasn’t.

Ali-Baba said his bomb works

And I said “No it doesn’t.”

Ali-Baba sure was right.

Correct ’twas the hunch he had,

But he misread the bombs locale.

Thus ended his jihad.

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June 12, 2018 · 12:12 pm

The Vanishing Glass

They can trap us in their zoo

Behind their walls of glass

And teach us social boundaries

That we’re not allowed to pass,

Feed us just enough bad news

To keep our anger stoked

So we don’t see the sedatives

With which we’re being poked.

We the livestock draw the crowds

Of wealthy and elected

Whose power cries more loudly

Than the souls they have neglected.

They say they’ll cure our poverty

If they can have their way

Then toast with million dollar wine

And fly their jets away.

We watch the birds who fly outside

This zoo we somehow cherish.

We think that if we join them

We would starve or freeze or perish,

Yet the glass is not unbreakable

In our patron’s steel zoo.

Some of us still crave the sky

And so I ask: Do you?

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June 8, 2018 · 6:32 pm

The Answer, At Last!

All the single ladies

Ask where all the good men went,

Dreaming of the good old days

When the six-foot-plus millionaires

Without egos or exes

Would contact them conveniently

And buy them stuff

All without leaving the house.

Meanwhile the six-foot-plus

Drama-free millionaires

Are in their basements

Roleplaying car thieves

And writing bad poetry blogs.

You’re welcome.

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June 7, 2018 · 10:27 am

Adventures In Milk Purchasing

I am a human

Who lives in a place

Where food can be purchased to eat.

Some take that for granted,

Some think it’s a nuisance,

And I think it’s pretty darn neat.

But sometimes I wonder

About fellow shoppers

Who bought before I came along.

I used to think fondly

Of my fellow humans*

But now I have proof I was wrong.

*This is a lie, but the photo is real

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June 1, 2018 · 3:37 pm

Pokemon: When A Binder Becomes A Portfolio

He wanted to be the very best

Like no one ever was.

He played the games and bought the cards.

His reasoning? “Just ’cause.”

Now he travels across the land

Rich and fancy free

Because he sold old merchandise

To folks like you and me.

It took some courage along the way

To claim his rightful place;

His base set boosters unopened still

By some amazing grace

Kept up in value as time went on.

The prices didn’t fall

Because of middle class ’90s kids

Who had to catch ’em all.

And so for all the neopets

Forgotten in the cloud,

The baseball rookies who faded out,

The fads without a crowd

There rose among them a modern god,

Electric mouse and friends

That makes you money enough to buy

The very world we must defend.

That’s why I’m buying at Toys R Us

Instead of buying stock.

Who know what franchise will soon become

The next Pokémon or pet rock?

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